Aliens exist !

36

Posted by 16elvinr | Posted in General News | Posted on 01-10-2014

Aliens exist
No matter what you insist
I think they live in the planet Howdpist,

Aliens exist
No matter what you insist
They eat flesh from an artist

Aliens exist
No matter what you insist
There might be a group that consits with five aliens

Aliens exists
No matter what you insists
One day I’ll find until you persist

Aliens exists
No matter what you insist
Some might be evil and some are good
But when you know them you will surely insist with me.

Aliens exist
No matter what you insist

A poem Elvin

Alien Power

Comments (36)

Hi Elvin

Your poem is really good because you made most
part of it rhyme . You even added a picture of a alien.

To make your work even better you could of
Added some colour in your work.

BY:Thanusika

Sorry Thanusika but my post don’t let me to put colour I have had this problem since Year 3!

Sorry!

Hi elvin,
I like the picture you put and I like the rhyming words.
You could have put different words not instead of putting everything as rhyming words.

By Rishi

Thanks for your reply Rishi and yes i will use different words than rhyming words!

hi Elvin i like your poem but next time put a fullstop on the end

Hi Elvin,

I like the way you added good rhyming words in your post. I also like the way you added a good picture to make your blog better.

You could have made it better by adding more detail and find more words to say instead of ‘no matter what you insist.’

Hi Elvin,

I like very much you poem of aliens exist, i like much you pitcher of you poem.

I like more if you add colours to you letters to be better you poem of alien exist.
BY Mateo.

hi Elvin

I really enjoyed reading your poem and its a nice rhyme because you make it sound like I want to read it again.

I disagree that aliens are real but to make it much better you could give us a question so we could answer it.

by Tyanna

Next time I will!

Hi Elvin

I like your poem that you have wrote about aliens, also I liked it that you have used rhyming words like’ aliens exists no matter what you insist ‘ .

Also you wrote in verses and I like that you are rhyming the word and it sounds like a rap or a soft song . Subsequently you are trying to make people to believe that aliens exists .

I remember the time when I watched a film about aliens and it was cool .

Just to let you now that aliens don’t exist .

By Veronica

Hi Veronica,
I like your comment to help me in my next poem about the learning one, But you said aliens don’t exist but when i am an astrobioloogist i will prove to the whole world aliens exist.

hi Vieronica

I really agree that the poem was really amazing also I really agree that aliens don’t exist.

From Claire

Hi Elvin

I like how you have used rymimg words like instist and Howdspit also instist and artist. I really liked the last sentence because you used an adverb For example:’But you know them they will surely insist with me’. You could of used more detail like when you wrote they eat flesh from an artist, why did you write they eat flesh from an artist?

I remember when my brother wrote a poem about when he thought an alien excisted. Why do you think aliens excist Elvin? Was you inspired to write the alien poem?

Hi Agash,
I like your comment and you asked me 2 question,
Why do you think aliens exist Elvin?
I think they exist because when i see the night sky when i star gaze there is always a white line .

Was you inspired to write the alien poem?
My future job inspired me to write this poem

Hi Elvin

I really like your poems and i like the picture of the alien.I really enjoyed it when i was reading it.Don’t put a full stop at the end because it is a poem.To make it better you can put some colour in your work.I saw in the internet onnce a foto of a alien i wished i can do a comment about it but know you done this comment and i thought i couldn’t do it better.

I wonder is that true what you said about the alien? Another thing what i wonder is that once i saw a thing in the bin and it was green is that flesh?

By Lathusan

Hi Lathusan,
You asked me that you saw a gree substance in the bin and you asked if it was flesh but flesh is red like the flesh we have.

Hi Elvin

I liked the way how you have started the poem. I also like the way how you have used rhyming. I thing you could improve your work by adding more adjectives like:’ hard flesh and five scary aliens. I remember a time when I wrote a story about an alien kidnapping a child.

By Anojan

Hi Anojan,
I agree with the adjective bit because a lot of people had said that.

hi Elvin
I like the fact that you have been putting lots of detail and you have been putting lots of repetitive words.
`In my opinion I think that aliens do not exist because they only come in movies just to scare you.
I also think you could have tried to add some more repetitive words.

By Swatika

Ok Swatika

Hi Elvin,
I like that you had use repetition in each verse. When you wrote your a poem it makes sense and you had use the picture to describe how the alien looks.

Were you inspire by a alien poem.

Hi Elvin,
2 things that were good about your poem is that it was really persuasive and it rhymed. I didn’t like that the poem was repetitive, but I understand that you done it on purpose. You could have used what the aliens look like. I think you have a great aptitude for writing poems.
Prince

Hi Prince,
As you said I love writing poems and my friends call me the poem master.

Hi Elvin
I really liked your poem about aliens. It really caught my eye.

I have a question to ask you, do you know what some of the words you have used mean? Also what do you mean by “no matter what you insist” because it doesn’t make sense to me. Next time you could be less repetitive. You have a real good aptitude for writing poems though.

I remember a time when i wrote a poem. It was about a greek goddess and we had to use proper adjectives. it started off like this,”athena is the goddess of wisdom and war, she just wouldn’t fall to floor,” it was more of a rap but you know what i mean.

I like the verisimilitude of the picture of the alien because its got really good detail and also its eye-catching background really caught my eye.

by ohm 5.2

Ok Ohm!

Hi Elvin
The poem that you constructed was really detailed and by reading it I can tell you have put a lot of effort into writing it. I like the fact that you used some repetition in your poem because it makes a commendable, effect for example: Aliens exist no matter what you insist. You have an commendable aptitude for writing poems.

By
Dhillon

Hi, Elvin
I adore your poem because I adore your poem and I adore the way you said No matter what you insist. I adore your poem because you also described the planet of the alien planet as Howdpist I also adore the way you described it and your aptitude of repative. Even better if you detail it more and you could write another word for good because it is boring you could write positive Alien except of writing good alien.

Hi Elvin,
It was a rhyming poem because it rhymed a lot.
In my opinion aliens do not exist because in films there are aliens just to scare you.
I liked your poem because it made me read it again.

Next time you could add some more colour and you could have added a question at the end so we could answer it.

BY TEHMINA

Hi Elvin

`Your post is really interesting i appreciate that you also have interest in poetry. You piece of poetry was amazing this is because you added repetition. I also like your work because you have created a Year 5 standard poem. You have also read your work. Your work has been a role model to the world this is a quote from your work Aliens exist o matter what you insist
I think they live in the planet Howdpist.

To make your work better you could add more verses because it is okay how it is but the writing could have been a bit more extended. I also think you should make the verses a bit more better.
B

Hi Elvin,

Your poem was very interesting and it makes me want to read more because you have used words which describe a lot of things. This is an amazing
standard for year 5 and the title of the poem is really
good because you have used something which can put a reader really in to it. Normally I see some poems which are like the same but this one is different to me

My feedback to you will be to maybe add more verses and some more writing on each little bit. Also you might just add more rhyming words because even if the poem is repetitive you can use more describing words. In my opinion I really like the poem and it can be a really great example for other people who are needing help to write a poem like yours.
“No matter what you insist

By Aravin 5.1

Hi Elvin,
I like your post because you use a lout of detail and effort in your work. I also like your post because you use repetition and you use capital letter but remember to put coma’s
(Aliens exist))
I like this part because you use it in every sentence you also keep putting in the same place.
By Ella-Rose-5:1

Hi Elvin

Your post is really interesting i appreciate that you also have interest in poetry. You piece of poetry was amazing this is because you added repetition. I also like your work because you have created a Year 5 standard poem. It seems you have also read your work. Your work has been a great example to the world this is a quote from your work Aliens exist o matter what you insist I think they live in the planet Howpist.The quote that i have copied is my favorite part of the poem

To make your work better you could add more verses because it is okay how it is but the writing could have been a bit more extended. I also think you should make the verses a bit more better.

By Samuel

Hello Elvin
I liked your repetition poem, I liked the bit when you kept on repeating the sentence ” Aliens exist no matter what you insist” another thing I liked was that your poem was engaging to read because you added lots of adjectives to make a scene eg flesh and evil , you could of put comas at the end of each sentence.
By Aamina

1Greetings Elvin

Your post was really interesting to read especially when you added repetition in you poem. I liked it when you added a cool looking picture to your post. Another reason why I liked your poem is because you made it Year 5 standard. To make your post more better you should have added color to your writing.”No matter what you insist you will always be the best at this”

I think that Aliens are not real because I haven’t seen or heard of one. Your poem would of been better if you asked some questions about Aliens and some facts
about them. You could of also made us vote to see if we think Aliens are real or not.

Ezra 5.1

Hi Elvin
I really enjoyed your poetry I really liked the part when you said aliens exist no matter you insist one day I’ll find until you persist. I also liked the fact that you used repetition in your work.
To improve your work you could of used commas to make your work make more sense.
I have read poems like yours but they say words that I don’t understand but in your poem I understand the words that you have used.
By;NIKHITA 5;3

Hi Elvin

I really liked your post about the alien exist the part I really liked was when you said that when you know then you will surely insist with me.Also you putted lots and lots of detail and I think this is the best post . You couldn’t of putted full stops when you finished your sentence.

Bye bye Elvin
By Mahmood 5.3

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